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A collection of snippets of the books I write and, occasionally, my life and the things that inspire my writing...

Sunday, February 4, 2018

Weekend Writing Warriors February 4, 2018



Hello fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers) Happy February.  :-)  ! 



  It's time for snips and bits of amazing tales by talented writers! Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live by before 9:00 AM Sunday, EST. (We check signups to remove links when we don't find a wewriwa post--to save our participants from clicking on empty links--so please have it live by 9:00 Sunday morning--eastern USA). Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.  
               
  This week's snippet is from a scifi short story working title: "Sporulators".  Captain Eastwold--the pilot who flew Lars on this recon trip speaks first. The agronomist, Lars, who is the fare, speaks second.  Some character building going on right now early in the story.


Here we go...

"But since you and your parent employer, DESA,  stuck the poster child of agricultural projects out in this lonely corner of the stars, it might be a good time to remind you that space has pretty much incalculable risks.”
Lars smiled at him—a stiff, professional smile. “Incalculable? Really, Eastwold? The best. We sent the very best. The best equipment, the best supplies, the best people.  People with microscopes and analytical labs set up on each square kilometer of ground.  DESA didn’t treat this like voodoo or magic. It was science that went to Greenleyone--science wielded by intelligent men.”
”  

  What works and what doesn't? I'm grateful for every bit of feedback you share.

40 comments:

  1. That 'professional smile' hides a bit of arrogance.

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    1. Oh, it does. It's a long way to fall... :-) Thanks for visiting, Ed!

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  2. Sometimes even the best isn't enough. I wonder if that's the case here.

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  3. Love this bit: "We sent the very best. The best equipment, the best supplies, the best people. People with microscopes and analytical labs."

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    1. Thanks, Trin! :-) Glad that part resonated with you!

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  4. So there was no way it could fail? I doubt that. Interesting setup!

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    1. No such things as fail-proof, huh? :-) Thanks, Christina!

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  5. Hmmm ... "science wielded by intelligent men" sounds suspiciously like the Titanic!

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    1. Haha! Never thought of it like that before. lol Thanks, Ian!

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  6. One of those "nothing is incalculable" guys, eh? I get the feeling he's about to proven very wrong.

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  7. As a scientist, I can tell you that everybody makes mistakes. The trick is not to repeat them.

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    1. True. But there is only so much that a human can control. :-) When you deal with living organisms, you take your best guess. Even tried and true can go awry. Genetic switches turn on and off. Organisms mutate, evolve... Strains crash out in the field. ~sigh~ Gotta love biology...

      Thanks, Aurora. :-)

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  8. Yeah, their science completely failed them I'm guessing. ;)

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  9. I'm betting space's incalculable risks wins.
    Tweeted.

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    1. A rough patch for sure. :-) Thanks, Daryl. :-)

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  10. Never trust a professional smile. Who knows what evil lurks behind it?

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  11. The best is still not enough in a setting that is still mostly unknown and unpredictable. You show the contrast between these two characters very well. :)

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    1. They are polar opposites---mostly. But they will find common ground-- fighting to live when they're up against it.

      Thanks, Jessica!

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  12. A professional smile can never be trusted. Great snippet

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    1. Yeah, I feel the same way. Give me a real smile, or forget about it. :-) Thanks, Naomi!

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  13. Protesting a bit TOO much? Nice scene, Teresa!!

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  14. Lars certainly seems overconfident here. Also, "science wielded by intelligent men"? Sounds like they forgot the women....will be interesting to see what happens next!

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    1. You caught that :-) It is just men, by design. :-) Thanks for visiting, Jean!

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  15. Hm, sounds like he's being rather over confident - something is bound to go wrong - isn't it? Great characterisation in this brief exchange between the two.

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    1. Yeppers. Over confidence is usually a very bad thing. Thanks, Hywela!

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  16. That conversation sounded very true to life to me. Nice characterization.

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  17. What a horse's patoot that Lars. Pride goeth... I'm afraid for those he boasts about.

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    1. Haha! Yes, Lars can be a horse's patoot! lol. Thanks, Diane!

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  18. When it seems too perfect to be true then it probably isn't going to be. Great realistic scene. :)

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  19. I'm not sure who is right. It seems that he has the science part well covering every eventuality.

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    1. He does. DESA did set it up right--the analytical end of it. The planning and organism selection made sense at the beginning. But one little genetic switch gets flipped off or on, and things go awry...

      Thanks, Linda!

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  20. You can never prepare for everything, but you can prepare for a lot. Obviously they found one of the unexpected problems!

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  21. I love how you managed to keep it conversational even with so much tech lingo.

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