Welcome to my world and beyond...

A collection of snippets of the books I write and, occasionally, my life and the things that inspire my writing...

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Weekend Writing Warriors: January 18, 2015



Welcome Warriors. If you'd like to know about the Weekend Writing Warriors teeshirts,  please see note at the end.
        Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 

          Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE     
          Set up: The MC was vanished without a trace for two years, then returned "without a trace" too.  After spending a year being treated for being delusional-- she's convinced that her dreams are actually her missing memories, she's now working with a volunteer church counselor, Rayanne. 
    Marissa is meeting with  Rayanne.
Rayanne is talking about her own childhood (at Marissa's request).  She just shared that her husband was killed in auto accident. The last line last week was: "It was our tenth anniversary."

[Rayanne] --> She paused again and glanced at the print hanging on the wall, at tiny clothing blowing on the impression of a breeze. “We wanted children but I couldn’t have them. We’d just started the adoption process, but after he was…gone, well, the finances changed for me and I couldn’t afford to continue. I moved back to Pittsburgh. My parents took me in, and here I am. My dad has moved on, fishing with my husband I like to believe. And I live in the house I grew up in. It’s in my name now."

 That's it. What works. What doesn't? I'm grateful for every comment you leave. :-)

Dana set up a wewriwa teeshirt deal with a company called teespring. There are several styles and colors available. We held down the price--no profit for wewriwa.  Everything is handled through teespring. You choose style and color from available options, they take your information, and the payment doesn't go through unless we meet a minimum number of sales. If they print the shirts, they also ship directly to the buyers. There's a tad over two weeks left if you'd like to pre-order one. If you want to see what's avaialble, click HERE!  That's it. 


Have a great week, all!

20 comments:

  1. Went back and read the last couple weeks. Into every life a little rain must fall...sounds like the counselor knows about love and loss personally...

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  2. Beautiful and raw, Teresa. This is some great stuff.

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  3. "Fishing with my husband…" I love that line. This was nicely done.

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  4. The flow of her words and the feelings they bring up work very well. I would like to see how Marissa is reacting, but my impatience might be due to the eight lines once a week delivery system. Sigh.

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  5. I agree with Alexis. Maybe a sentence to show Marissa's reaction but she allows Rayanne to continue. I also picture my first love drinking coffee with friends gone beyond, laughing at jokes or sometimes watching me.Beautiful scene, Teresa.

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  6. :( How sad. How could she move on? If I were Marissa I think that would be what I would ask. Poor Rayanne. What an emotional snippet, Teresa.

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  7. Sounds like a strong woman. Amazing what we can do when pressed. Good snippet, Teresa.

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  8. I nearly cried Teresa. So many people would make great parents and just can't have them. Very relatable eight! Love it! I'm buying a t-shirt on my next check also, still trying to figure out which color I want. Great idea Dana.

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  9. These 8 lines made me emotional. Rayanne is surely a strong woman; the line "fishing with my husband" shows a sure faith that there is "something" beyond and even sounds a little positive, a reason perhaps to keep living. Well done snippet, speaks right to the reader's heart.

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  10. Rayanne is such a good character, Teresa---strong and serene.

    I hope Marissa can learn to relate to her. :)

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  11. My eyes get teary as I listen to her story. Beautifully poignant writing.

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  12. Got all choked up my friend, unbelievably moving.. I've missed your incredible writing. I'm glad I'm back.

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  13. Oh so poignant. She's strong and likable. I want good things to happen for her.

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  14. The sense of having moved on, having made hard choices to do so, is clear in every word. Nicely done.

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  15. Poor Rayanne. Both she and Marissa have had some hard turns in their lives. Hope some good ones are coming their way.

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  16. Another great emotional snippet! Hope there's a positive light after their sad past. Also, not sure if typo but maybe change "at tiny" to "a tiny" in reference to the print. :)

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  17. I agree with the people who mentioned that some reaction from Marissa would be good. She's kind of missing from the scene and it would break up the monologue.

    That being said, I also agree with the people who think this snippet is emotional and shows off a great character!

    Last note, "a tiny clothing" is vague so I can't picture the print. Should I see a t-shirt on a clothes line or a scarf floating untethered? A little precision could be a great opportunity to add a layer of symbolism to the scene. ;)

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  18. That's so sad. I just want to send her chocolates and a teddy bear!

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  19. That's a lot of emotional baggage to have to deal with. I hope luck turns around for both of them.

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  20. This makes me feel sad for the character. Can't really suggest more than what's been said. :)

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