Six Sentence Sunday August 5, 2012

Hope everyone had a good week. It's August already! Time is flying.

Six Sentence Sunday--for anyone who doesn't know, is a blog hop. Participants post six sentences from a piece of their writing.  Participants then visit other participants by clicking on their links on the linkylist, or clicking on their photos on comments following posts.  Be sure to sign up at, and link to the official Six Sentence Sunday .

This week, back to my WIP, ATNS.  Homeless, Marissa, has just gorged herself on four (took your advice, Jess Shira ) hotdogs she dug out of a trashcan behind a restaurant. She is settling down for the night in a crumbling old factory--feeling fortunate to have roof over her head.

This snippet is a bit long, but I'm wrapping up her waking hours.  Next week I'll be shifting into her dream sequence.

"She lay down on her bed, no more than pile of rags—old coats and a tattered blanket.  Gazing out the now shut window, as her eyes adjusted to the deepening night, the few brightest stars appeared.  Looking at them, she was overcome with hope.

Maybe this time.  Maybe Rayanne was right.  Gavin, her missing baby, a job, respect, looking in a mirror without seeing shame staring back.  Her life.  Maybe this really was the start of getting it back.  “Please…if there is a god--and  and you’re  listening, help me find my way back to the world of the sane.”

Her eyes grew heavy.  Survival was hard work.  Her breaths became even and deep, and any tension left in her body escaped as she relaxed into sleep."

All comments and criticisms accepted with gratitude. 

Have a good week, all. :-)

Six Sentence Sunday: July 8th, 2012

Hello, talented fellow sixers and lovely readers.  This week, back to "Across the Night Sky".

In the SSS posts for the last two weeks, Marissa completed her first journal entry.  The journal is being kept at the request of a volunteer counselor in an effort to help Marissa distinguish dreams from reality. Now, she's facing the day.

This week's six:

"Marissa closed the journal Rayanne had given her, clipping the pen over the cover, then slid it into her backpack.    

She made her way from the relative quiet of the Allegheny River shore ,toward traffic, businesses,  and maybe even a meal.

Upriver was the familiarity of the old, crumbling, red brick factory that was home. She didn’t know how long she’d have it—her pauper’s refuge. There were fewer and fewer abandoned buildings left standing, a result of the city’s focus on revitalization.

Continuing upriver from Allegheny Center toward the stadiums, she watched a steady stream of people avoid her.  Just as well.  It made it easier to slip behind the hot dog shop and rifle through their garbage." 

That's it for this week.

Comments, criticisms...and just plain "Hellos" are accepted with a smile.

To read the Six Sentence Snippets from other talented writers, click HERE

Thanks for visiting and have a great week, all! :-)

Six Sentence Sunday May 27th 2012

I hope that everyone is enjoying the first official weekend of summer.  And that we (Americans) all remember to pause at 3:00 P.M. on Monday, for a moment to remember those who gave their all. 

This week, back to Aaydan's Tale.  Deamante is considering the actions of a man--Gadsarapon, who claims to be his illegitimate son.

"The old ruler strolled along garden paths; the crushed pink quartzite lining them crunched beneath his expensive shoes.  Here, next to the river, thoughts became clear.   Ballsy, Gads had been ballsy. Maybe there was truth to his claim to blood.  Deamante had never before seen anyone, other than in the mirror, with quite so much moxie."

Any and all critiques, received with gratitude.

To read  six sentence snippets from other participants, click here.

Six Sentence Sunday for 4-15-12

              For other great Six Sentence Sunday posts, click here                

This week's six is from the first book I wrote. It has a year's worth of editing still waiting in its pages.  But the story is engaging.

Gracie has been abducted from earth. Ultimately, as a life-saving measure on his part, she has ended up with an alien man who is slated to become King of a vast empire beyond our night sky.  There are differences--can't you just imagine how many differences there would be between us and those from another planet?  Just using the vast differences between the many cultures and races right here on a single world--the math is staggering.

So, we take a look at life in general to discern the things that would undoubtedly need to be addressed to build a compromise.

Sex...  Yep.  The differences in the way distinct Earth cultures view sex leads me to believe that chances are good that expected behavior by one group would differ from that of other groups.  Faith, religions, evolutionary psychology, among other things are all major influences.

In this snippet, Gracie (of Earth) has confided in her alien (Rialtan) friend and guard, Jia,  about sex.  And Jia has been commanded by her young King to divulge the information to him and his friend, the healer Ben.

 “I believe that things are different on her world, on earth.   I probably should not have done it, but I tormented her just a bit, and then she told me the story of the cow and the milk.”   Jia repeated the earth fable she had been told.

“Jia, please explain to Ben and me, the motivation for this milk and cow trying and buying?”

 

Jia felt put on the spot while trying her best to remember word for word what had been said,  “The cow would have a broken heart.”

Ben hesitated for a minute, and finally said, “There is something missing--she must have said more.”

 I admit, I was very unsure...putting this into a story because the stigma of the "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" seems to have very much passed in my part of the world.  But then thought better of it.  It still very much exists in some parts of the world...and it is likely a generational thing, as well.

I will add this, since this snippet leaves the six readers hanging, after several paragraphs going back and forth while Jia tries to recall all of the words Gracie shared with her, Ben, rather incredulous, states, 

“Does she not understand that a Rialtan man would never purchase a cow without first trying the milk?”

Okay, that's  my 'seven' sunday for this week.

SixSunday for 4-8-12

Today's Six from my WIP, Aaydan's Tale.  You can find other entries HERE

The scene:  Meridius, where Provincial Regent of Meridius, Gadsarapon (Gads)--who claims to be Deamante's bastard son, has just endured a night of cold, calculated learning at the feet of Deamante.  A coup has begun, and though it appears to be about over...the worst is yet to come.

"On Meridius, a red glow was building in the east, giving an eerie illumination to a city that had seen brutal bloodshed just hours before.  Thousands of people felt relief at the coming sun, but even greater relief at the setting moon.  Some wept tears of gratitude to be alive. Most, the day before, had never seen a single good thing in the Dominion, but today, they  gave the Dominion full credit for their survival.

There were hundreds, though, who were slipping out of town unnoticed…those who chose to take their chances in the outlands with the Albainns--rather than with the Dominion.

Gads looked out at a city full of humble residents, marveling at how easily they had been brought to their knees."

Six Sentence Sunday

 The Official Six Sentence Sunday for 4-1-12 is upon us!  April, already!!  :-)  Showers and flowers, and sixsunday for another month.

This week, I return to Aaydan's Tale.  It will be in the hands of the publisher by the end of the month.  

In this snippet, a glimpse at the complex and flawed man--Deamante.  The ruler is viewed as savior by some, an oppressive demon by others. 

At a meeting with his security council, he announced a higher level of official intolerance of the Albainns.  There are even darker plans in the works, though. Intolerance is not enough. Elimination is the covert focus.

"There are always sympathizers who will view this as an extreme and unnecessary measure.”

The aide said, without a hint of emotion, “If all is managed properly, the blame in the eyes of those same sympathizers will not lie upon your doorstep.”

Deamante dismissed the aide with a flip of his hand, then turned and walked over to the wide windows where he could see glistening red and pink rocks in the midday star-shine.

Harsh decisions were his job, and in reality, nothing about this decision made him feel good, save the one small benefit…the one animal that he could do without. 

But, inside of him, well-hidden, a tiny part cried. A tiny part that wondered how it had ever gone so wrong, and if there truly were blood to him—in that face that did not resemble his own in any way."

Six Sentence Sunday for 3-25-12. Snippet from "Aaydan's Tale"

 Six Sentence Sunday for March 25, 2012 linky-list.

In this scene, Brendyn-- the great nephew of Deamante--the sitting ruler of the Dominion, is attending a meeting of  The Delegations. He was given no choice about attending. Deamante claims no children, and Brendyn has become next in line to rule--of which he wants no part.. 

"Unable to focus any longer on Deamante’s hate-filled words, Brendyn’s mind wondered, taking him to a place, and a boyhood friendship formed during his summers on a world that eschewed hatred. The spiritual folks who ran it had stressed tolerance, and saw to fostering a deep understanding within the young summer-visitors.

He pictured the face of Aaydan, and recalled how many times pain had been the expression...the pain of emotions he faced while being taught the reality in the rest of the Dominion.  The teachers had been straightforward with all of the children, and Aaydan knew that the future waiting on him was one of rejection, perhaps even physical threat. 

When looking at Aaydan, Brendyn had only ever seen the face of a friend; there had never been the face of evil.  But evil was the face that Deamante saw when he looked at an Albainn..."

Official Six Sentence Sunday for 3-11-12

This is the linky-list for this week's Six Sentence Sunday 3-11-12

W.I.P I am currently editing. Book I of the Flesh Trilogy.

And like so many people who--in the silence of pre-sleep, cannot keep the ghosts of the past from appearing to them, his ghost came…he saw her.

She was beautiful…but…it had to be. He could not have lived with that abomination born of her body. And all could clearly see there had been a betrayal...there must have been a betrayal. Few things made him feel emotions that he could not control, but her ghost, the ghost of the only woman he had ever loved, made wave after wave of sorrow wash over him. For, rather than nurture their love...he had done just the opposite.