Weekend Writing Warriors: February 23, 2014

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.

Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.

Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE 

This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable, and Deamante believes this is because the new mother, his mate Rella, cheated on him. The healer asked Deamante if he wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public.  He left, along with the healer and the aides, leaving the two women alone in the birth  room. Crinda, Rella's sister, just told Rella that they have to go (to safety NOW). Rella is in denial that her mate will harm her, but accepts that he would kill the newborn. This is now in Crinda's POV.  To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE. 

Creative punctuation warning. 

One more week after today, and the first chapter is finished. Thank you all so much for reading  it and sharing ideas and encouragement. :-) 

It took all the will that Crinda could muster to let go of Rella and focus on the urgency of the situation.

Rella's long lashes glinted wet from the tears she tried to blink back. "Please take care of him, and keep him away from his father." She kissed his pale-pink, baby cheek and said, "I love you Tayden." 

Crinda took The baby out of his mother's arms and said, “I have to go; Deamante's henchman will be here any minute.”  Wrapping him in folds of her shawl, she turned away from the bed, away from the look on Rella’s face—a jumbled mixture of determination, resignation, and loss. Crinda couldn't afford any distraction; her sole purpose now was saving her tiny nephew. Willing away fear and grief, she grasped at stoicism, the best she could hope for; she’d need it to walk away from her little sister, sure she’d never see her again.

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad, I'd love to hear. And I'm truly grateful for every bit of criticism; I do learn from it. Have a great week, everyone, and if you are in colder climes, stay warm. :-)