Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns. So glad you could stop by for a visit. :-)
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Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE
Someone commented last week about the word, "juman". It is a change up on the word "human" and it is what these people are--with the exception of Tayden, who is an Albainne.
The travelers are now on the boat that is taking them upriver into the Firce Mountains. :-) We are still in Kad's POV.
Tayden reached up and grabbed the front of his hood, then paused to glance at his two friends. He pulled it down only after Drave gave
him a go-ahead nod.
His white hair
sparkled silver in the sunshine, and his blue eyes ringed in violet were
downcast. Dimples marked the spots on his cheeks directly behind where his
extra set of canines made very non-Juman-like bumps beneath his skin.
Wiley tipped an imaginary hat toward Tayden, then said, “Now don’t
that feel some better?”
Tayden's eyes met Wiley's, and a smile teased at the corners of his lips. His voice carried a note of anxiousness, maybe even hope when he pressed, "Did your Maker ever answer you?"
Tayden's eyes met Wiley's, and a smile teased at the corners of his lips. His voice carried a note of anxiousness, maybe even hope when he pressed, "Did your Maker ever answer you?"
Wiley's still not done. He has a story to tell Tayden about his Maker answering him.
That's it. What works, what doesn't?
Real world news... Granddaughter number 2 is scheduled to arrive via c-section Monday morning. Her 6 year old sister chose her name: "Ava" and her mom and dad have honored me by tacking on "Reese" as her middle name. (Reese is my nickname here at home).
And, we found out yesterday that grandchild number 3 (due January 2) is a girl. :-)
That's it. What works, what doesn't?
Real world news... Granddaughter number 2 is scheduled to arrive via c-section Monday morning. Her 6 year old sister chose her name: "Ava" and her mom and dad have honored me by tacking on "Reese" as her middle name. (Reese is my nickname here at home).
And, we found out yesterday that grandchild number 3 (due January 2) is a girl. :-)
Mazel Tov on all of the grandchild news!
ReplyDeleteI like Wiley a little more each week. I like how he makes Tayden feel comfortable
He's a good guy. Makes almost everyone feel comfortable. Thanks for visiting, Chelle. :-)
DeleteIt feels a little bit frightening. I hope it will be ok.
ReplyDeleteMuch more frightening stuff ahead, but in the end... :-) Thanks for visiting, Linda!
DeleteLove the description for Tayden. Very vivid :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Heather! :-)
DeleteWiley is describing today's world-judging people by a glance, never giving them a chance. Whatever happened to Do unto others. . .?But then we'd have a perfect world. So hurray for your wily Wiley and let the story unfold.
ReplyDeleteGirls,girls,girls! wonderful. Congratulations to all.
Good observations, Charmaine!
DeleteYes, girls, girls, girls ;-) I'm not picky--just hope they are all blessed with health. :-)
Everything seems right here. I like Wiley's story so far and will be interested to read the rest of it. Nice snippet and congrats on the upcoming grandchild.
ReplyDeleteThanks, and Thanks, Frank!
DeleteLovely description and nice setting.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Gemma! :-)
DeleteAnother great excerpt, Reesie! I like Wiley too, and because I like him I want to mention this. Be careful with what he says and how he says it. If he pontificates about stuff, he could go from smart, friendly guy to annoying know-it-all. Currently he's a nice foil for the tense and gritty group of Tayden and his friends. I don't think you want Wiley to become preachy, but of course you know the characters and the story better than me. I simply offer one person's opinion.
ReplyDeleteBig congrats on all the grandkids! What a busy time you guys will be having! It's good kind of busy though :)
Totally took your comment to heart, Marcia, and adjusted accordingly! Thanks :-)
DeleteOh so many babies, congratulations on all of them, and blessings for good health of mommies and babies! :)
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed what a vivid description you gave of Tayden. Alas, I need to go read more of your snippets because otherwise I have soooo many questions.
Thanks, so much! :-)
Deleteoh, beautiful descriptions! love those dabs of color you tossed in there :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elena! :-)
DeleteLove the description, though I'm still wondering what kind of genetic difference could make the difference between Junan and Albainne, since Tayden is clearly the son of a Junan mother. I suspect a recessive mutation of some control genes, but I'd like to know more.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sue Ann. I'd like to send you an email to question an expert in genetics. :-)
DeleteTayden's description is so vivid and different I had to read it twice to picture such a person. Fascinating. How do you come up with all this world-building stuff? Kudos!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jenna. How do I? I guess that since I know what his species does, I looked at what physical adaptations he might need to accomplish that. :-)
DeleteHow exciting! Congrats on the grandchildren. I can't wait to read about Wylie's maker.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elaine. She (grandgirl number 2) is just so beautiful!
DeleteBest wishes on the granddaughters! Very exciting...enjoyed the excerpt, especially the description of his dimples. Great 8!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Veronica! And thanks :-)
DeleteCongratulations on your imminent grandchild! :)
ReplyDeleteEverything works for me in the snippet. I want a Wylie of my own...
Thanks, Sarah! And thanks! :-)
DeleteI liked the "tip of the hat" line.
ReplyDeleteKudos!
Thanks, Chip :-)
DeleteCongrats on the grandchildren! And love, love, the description of Tayden! Great snippet, Teresa!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elyzabeth!
DeleteCongratulations on the baby. Love the description and Wiley is such a great guide.
ReplyDeleteThank you, and thank you! :-)
DeleteI love your description of Tayden, and the dialogue from Wiley.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your coming grandkids!
Thanks, Carrie-Anne--and thanks! :-)
DeleteLove all the description! He sounds like an interesting fellow.
ReplyDeleteThe line "Dimples marked the spots on his cheeks directly behind where his extra set of canines made very non-Juman-like bumps beneath his skin" lost me a bit though.
It needs a little simplifying, I think. Even as little as "Dimples marked his cheeks..." would help.
Good call, Caitlin. :-) Thank you!
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New Post Up On The Blog: Paradise Island
With Love,
Monique (The Slim Kid Inside)
Hi Monique. Thanks for visiting. :-)
ReplyDelete