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A collection of snippets of the books I write and, occasionally, my life and the things that inspire my writing...

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Weekend Writing Warriors: July 10, 2016



Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)! :-) 

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live before 9:00 AM Sunday EST. (We check signups and remove links when we don't find a wewriwa post-- to save our participants from clicking on empty links--so please have it live by 9:00 Sunday morning--eastern USA) Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE




Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens, galactic slavers. Our MC, Lily, and her dog, Jobe, were captured.  Moving ahead a little in the story: They were loaded onto a shuttle and their captors hauled them off the surface into space.  They were transferred to a large holding cell filled with creatures of all sorts, and none seemed friendly until some French speaking Earthlings were thrown into the same cell. A load of mystery food was dumped onto the floor in the center of the large cell. Lily scooped up some of it in her hands. The last sentence last week was this: "She had no idea what she was grabbing, but when she left the frenzy, she had two fists full.
         We pick up from there:
 

She returned to her place where Jobe waited. While she sniffed the slop, she watched for anyone approaching. A faint scent of vinegar mingled with the smell of meat.  She handed some to Jobe. When he devoured it, she gave him the rest, unsure if she could eat it anyway. Where the hell do you get meat out in space? The first  possibility that popped into her mind left her feeling queasy, but Jobe had no qualms about the source of his food.
Another load fell from the ceiling. She waited until the first wave of prisoners finished mobbing the new pile and moved away with their hands full, and then she went back. She put her hands together and scooped up what appeared to be a cooked grain.



That's it. What works? What doesn't?  I appreciate your comments and learn from them. :-)

20 comments:

  1. I like her caution and I'm glad it was rewarded with a second shipment of food that's less questionable. I have a question, though, which you may have covered in the text. How was the dog secured to keep it from leaping into the fray and gobbling up all the food it could gobble?

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  2. Great details, as ever Teresa. This story keeps getting more and more fascinating. =D

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  3. At least they're being fed! If I was her, I'd wonder what was in the food, not just the source of the meat, but also possible poisoning. I'm really enjoying this story.

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  4. I sympathise with her caution about the food. I too would want to know the source of the meat. I echo Ed's question about the well-behaved dog. Fascinating story.

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  5. "Where the hell do you get meat out in space?" - good question, not one she's likely to want answered. On the plus side, if they're slavers they have an incentive not to poison their cargo.

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  6. Bad position to be in for her. The dog-well-he's into eating anything anytime bu her-that's a problem.

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  7. Glad she stayed away from the meat, but all the food is suspect. If not species, additives should be a concern! Glad to be back with Lily, Teresa.

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  8. Glad she stayed away from the meat, but all the food is suspect. If not species, additives should be a concern! Glad to be back with Lily, Teresa.

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  9. I like that she's intelligent enough to be cautious and ask questions, but I feel like ignorance is bliss in this scenario. ;)

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  10. Well, if Jobe is eating it, it can't be too bad. Though, in her situation, I would be cautious, too. The cooked grain seems like a better option. I hope. Great snippet! :)

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  11. Glad there was some cooked grain at least, not wanting to speculate on the source of the other protein. Not sure you really want to create that train of thought? Depends how dark you want the novel to be I guess.

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  12. Yum, alien mystery meat. I think letting the dog have that is wise. Nice of them to provide grain too. :-)

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  13. Well, I guess space grain is better than space mystery meat. Ew. *shudder*

    Terrific, visceral snippet!

    Heather

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  14. I don't even want to think of the source of the meat... and it APPEARED to be cooked grain. I guess when you are starving you have to take your chances.

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  15. Yeah, good call on the meat. Jobe won't mind. And I hope the grain turns out to be some cheap intergalactic wheat, not mealed alien brains. :) Can't wait for the next installment!

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  16. Yeah, with alien food, who knows what's what. Very visceral, empathy-invoking snippet here for sure.

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  17. Wonderful. Can't wait for the excerpt.

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  18. I'm hoping it's synthesized meat, and not people. That'd be extra disturbing.

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  19. Ewwww, nice gross out, whatever it ends up being!

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  20. Who knows what that is? BUt if the alternative is starving... No?

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