Weekend Writing Warriors: February 23, 2014

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.

Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.

Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE 

This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable, and Deamante believes this is because the new mother, his mate Rella, cheated on him. The healer asked Deamante if he wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public.  He left, along with the healer and the aides, leaving the two women alone in the birth  room. Crinda, Rella's sister, just told Rella that they have to go (to safety NOW). Rella is in denial that her mate will harm her, but accepts that he would kill the newborn. This is now in Crinda's POV.  To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE. 

Creative punctuation warning. 

One more week after today, and the first chapter is finished. Thank you all so much for reading  it and sharing ideas and encouragement. :-) 

It took all the will that Crinda could muster to let go of Rella and focus on the urgency of the situation.

Rella's long lashes glinted wet from the tears she tried to blink back. "Please take care of him, and keep him away from his father." She kissed his pale-pink, baby cheek and said, "I love you Tayden." 

Crinda took The baby out of his mother's arms and said, “I have to go; Deamante's henchman will be here any minute.”  Wrapping him in folds of her shawl, she turned away from the bed, away from the look on Rella’s face—a jumbled mixture of determination, resignation, and loss. Crinda couldn't afford any distraction; her sole purpose now was saving her tiny nephew. Willing away fear and grief, she grasped at stoicism, the best she could hope for; she’d need it to walk away from her little sister, sure she’d never see her again.

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad, I'd love to hear. And I'm truly grateful for every bit of criticism; I do learn from it. Have a great week, everyone, and if you are in colder climes, stay warm. :-)

Weekend Writing Warriors Januray 16, 2014

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.

Another week of snow and cold here in North Eastern USA. It's good writing weather, though.
 
Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.

Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

  This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable, and Deamante believes this is because the new mother, his mate Rella, cheated on him. The healer asked Deamante if he wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public.  He left, along with the healer and the aides, leaving the two women alone in the birth  room. Crinda is Rella's sister. Crinda just told Rella that they have to go (to safety NOW). Rella is in denial that her mate will harm her, but accepts that he would kill the newborn.  Crinda speaks first. This is now in Crinda's POV.  To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE. 

In the answering silence, Crinda added, “The glass. The bones.”

Rella’s voice was low and oddly composed when she answered. “The auguries are wrong; I have to stay. But you can do it--you can slip the baby out of here and take him to safety.”

They were out of time. Defeated, Crinda accepted what she must do. Sliding her  hands to cradle Rella’s face, her gaze lingered for unaffordable seconds, a last fleeting glimpse to register the beauty, the goodness, and the love that existed in her baby sister.

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad, I'd love to hear. And I'm truly grateful for every bit of criticism; I do learn from it. Have a great week, everyone, and if you are in colder climes, stay warm. :-)

Weekend Writing Warriors: February 9, 2014

 

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.

The week of sweethearts. I was going to shift to another part of the book so I could quote from a sweet scene, but was afraid I might disappoint you guys. So from last week.
 
Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
  This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable, and Deamante believes this is because the new mother, his mate Rella, cheated on him. The healer asked Deamante if he wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public.  He left, along with the healer and the aides, leaving the two women alone in the birth  room. Crinda is Rella's sister. Crinda just told Rella that they have to go (to safety). Now.  Rella speaks first. This is now in Crinda's POV.  To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE. 

"Rella shook her head while she said, “He won’t hurt me, Crinda. He loves me, but the baby isn’t safe.”

She didn't know how to get through to her sister. The cold bastard wasn't going to limit his execution to just the child; he was going to kill Rella too. There  were precious few moments to make an escape. Still, she had to try to make Rella understand a grave truth of life; when people kill for the sake of love, sometimes it's the very person they love who ends up dead. With only inches separating their faces, Crinda insisted, “He will do more than hurt you, Rella.  You have to leave now.”

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad, I'd love to hear. And I'm truly grateful for every bit of criticism; I do learn from it. Have a great week, everyone, and if you are in colder climes, stay warm. :-)

Weekend Writing Warriors: February 2, 2014

 

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.
Thanks everyone for flip-flopping around to accommodate our site maintenance. We're all good and back on track now. We have a few little changes coming up, but nothing that will affect site use. Just some things we've been planning to make wewriwa.com a more useful tool for our participants. More about that to come in the next several weeks.
Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
 
This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable.  The air is thick with tension as the moments following the birth tick by. The healer asked Deamante if we wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public. He believes he's been betrayed by his mate. He left, along with the healer and the aides, leaving the two women alone in the room. Rella is the new mother, and Crinda is Rella's sister. To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE. 

Using the corner of a blanket, Crinda dabbed at the tears on Rella’s face.” “I believe you.”

Rella reached out and  grasped Crinda’s wrist, then her words tumbled out in a desperate stream, "I think he really will kill him. Please, help me.”

Crinda tried using her big sister voice, but it came out more a plea than a demand, “Neither of you are safe. You both must go. Now.”

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad ? I'd love to hear it and am truly grateful for every bit of criticism, opinion, and shared wisdom.  Thank you so much for visiting!  


The Facebook Snippet Sunday group (no connection to us, but many wewriwa participants do both groups, so as a courtesy...) can be found HERE

Weekend Writing Warriors: January 26, 2014

Welcome Warriors, and Snipsuns, and anyone else who wanders in.

We are doing some site maintenance for wewriwa.com, so we ask that for this week, you visit wewriwa.blogspot.com to access the linky list and find a lot of great writers and their 8 sentence snippets. There's something for everyone.

If you haven't taken the time to answer the five short survey questions in our Weekend Writing Warriors poll, please do. The link is HERE . Wewriwa has been hosting all you talented writers for almost a year now. The admins thought it might be a good time to take stock to see how we're doing --in the eyes of everyone who is using, or has used the site. Not promising changes, but we're listening; we'd love to hear from you. It's important to us because you, the participants, are what makes this site work. Please feel free to share that link and spread the word.

Finally: Weekend writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, to go live between noon, Saturday and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.

The Snippet Sunday group can be found HERE

This is from a WIP, a fantasy story. Working title is: "Taydan: Child Denied"The ruler, Deamante, has just become a father.  The unthinkable has happened--the child was born unacceptable.  The air is thick with tension as the moments following the birth tick by. The healer asked Deamante if we wants to do away with it. "It" being the newborn. He said yes, but wants to wait to make it public. He believes he's been betrayed by his mate. Rella is the mother, and Crinda is Rella's sister. To see a compilation of snippets previously posted from this chapter, click HERE.

He spun on his heel and departed, with his aides scurrying to keep up.

Collapsing into her pillow, Rella shook with sobs.

Crinda squeezed her shoulder and urged, “Rella, collect yourself. We have to act now.”

Rella sucked in a breath of air and held it for a few seconds then slowly blew it out. She looked up and met Crinda's eyes, mirrored pools of summer-sky-blue pain, fear, and longing.  A leftover shudder of a sob racked her when she said, “You believe me, Crinda, don’t you? I was with no other, and I don’t know how this happened.”

That's it. What jumps out at you, good or bad ? I'd love to hear it and am truly grateful for every bit of criticism, opinion, and shared wisdom.  Thank you so much for visiting!