Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors, where we share snips and bits of amazing tales by talented authors and writers. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished (we like it all) on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM each Sunday. Then we visit each other and read and comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
Snippet Sunday group from facebook, not us, but many of our participants do both, is HERE
This snippet if from Emmily, Unbound, a contemporary romance with sci-fi elements. It's in First-person.
There could be wonky punctuation to keep within the #wewriwa
guidelines.
Emmily, the main character has lost pretty much everything in the last twelve months. She and her dog, Murphy, are moving to an old hunting camp her dad and mom willed to her.
This is chapter one. Last week's snippet ended with this: That
was my parents’ credo, especially dad’s. A stranger really was a friend he
didn’t know.
We continue from there.
The snippet:
Seeing
how overgrown the lane is, I wonder what shape the cabin’s in. I should have
come up here to check on it after the will was read, after it became officially
mine, Emmily Wagner, only living child of Elma and Burt Wagner.
The
hemlocks and mountain laurel seem to close in around the car as I drive up the
steep hill. I
take a deep breath, turn on the headlights, and count as I exhale. A mental
note forms, that the trees need a good trimming to get them way back off the
road. The job’s bigger than I can handle, so I’ll have to hire someone to do
it.
After a half-mile of switchbacks and rainwater ruts, the cabin--tucked into its
little clearing--comes into view. I’m back in the sunshine, at least what's left of
it: The deep-pink, final moments of daylight.
I sigh... Well, the hunting camp isn't quite as rough-looking as the sign at the
end of the lane, but it's going to need some work..
That's
it for this week. Thanks for visiting! I am truly grateful for comments, suggestions, and for you taking the time
to read it.
Gret snippet, I love your descriptive prose, it flows so beautifully and I'm there, with Emily!
ReplyDelete:-D <-- BIG smile. Thanks, Hywela! Welcome back from your holiday!
DeleteThis is a real wilderness hideout. I hope the roof is intact and no animal squatters have taken over the place.
ReplyDeleteWhat's about to move in is worse than wild animals. **evil laugh** Thanks, Ed!
DeleteYour descriptions are wonderful--I go to exactly such a cabin each year and you've taken me there perfectly. Can't wait to see the cabin!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jenna! I hope the description is detailed enough--but not tedious. :-)
DeleteI can really "see" this scene. I'm taking this ride with her and enjoying it!
ReplyDeleteWoot! Encouraging words to read. Thanks, Nancy!
DeleteA lovely snippet and all the detail is wonderful. I can really visualize the scene and the cabin. Loved the excerpt!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Jean! Your words mean the world to me!
DeleteI agree with everyone else- great descriptions. The detail of the overgrown trees helps increase the sense of isolation.
ReplyDeleteI am so tickled that you caught that, Alexis! Thanks!
DeleteUsing 1st person present really makes the scene real. It draws me in from the very beginning. Good job.
ReplyDeleteThanks so very much, Diane! Plan on tackling the ms. starting this week. Thanks again for your feedback! :-)
DeleteGreat imagery! I felt like I was there, too.
ReplyDeleteCool! I am so happy to read your words, Karen! :-)
DeleteThe route to the cabin with the overgrown trees is vividly descriptive. I wonder what she's going to find inside the cabin.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elyzabeth! She wonders too. I hope the readers will turn the page to find out. :-)
DeleteI'm late to the party and echoing everyone else here but I love your descriptions! I could almost feel the bumps in the road!
ReplyDeleteI'm usually late, too, Emily!Thanks for your encouraging words! :-)
DeleteWonderful snippet. Loving the detail of the overgrown trees.
ReplyDeleteYour story is so lovely. You have created a fine story that gives me the shivers.
ReplyDeleteMy son and I live in a very small town 50 miles from any city. I love rural settings. I only wish my body was up to doing the hard work that would be necessary on a place like you have described here. It would be good for my mental health.
ReplyDelete