Weekend Writing Warriors July 7th, 2019

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors!

Sorry for my absence for so long. How are you all doing? Any fun vacations going on? New books launched?

I went down the rabbit hole with a story that, for thirty-nine days, took over my life. The book is finished. It's resting  now after a first edit pass. I'll be back to it in a month or so with fresh eyes. But for today, I'm back to Dhor'en Sands.

Weekend Writing Warriors is where we share snips and bits of amazing tales by talented authors and writers. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished (we like it all) on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM each Sunday. Then we visit each other and read and comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 

Snippet Sunday group from facebook, not us, but many of our participants do both, is HERE

This week's snippet is, perhaps, exibition A of my current  writing craziness. It's the beginning of my scifi WIP, Dhor'en Sands. If it looks familiar, it's because I've posted a lot of this story already, BUT...I'm doing a big POV change-up. I'm going from third person past, to first person present.

I don't know if it will work. I just know that I feel the story when I'm writing first person, and when I switch back to third, it feels too distant.

Please feel free to be brutally honest about the snippet. I'm kind of feeling around in the dark right now.

Note* Creative punctuation used at times to stay within 8 to 10 sentences max. 

 

A mixture of smoke and dust blow my way, carrying the smell of civilization burning to the ground.  Staying as low as I can, I twist around to look between broken bricks and shattered wood.  Nothing…  But they'll come. There's no changing that. 

I swallow down sobs, studying the photo in my hands. Gracie’s freckled nose is a miniature of mine, but Annie’s crooked smile is a mirror of her dad’s. He sits between them, pulling our daughters close.  Their hero. Mine, too.

 

I'm truly grateful for any comment or critique you share. Thanks for visiting!

Scattered Bones: Weekend Writing Warriors

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors. Last wewriwa post of February 2019! March is just around the muddy, windy, icy, snowy, slushy corner. ;-)

   It's time for snips and bits of amazing tales by talented writers! Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM Sunday, EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
             Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE
            This week's snippet is from my WIP, "The Sands of Dhor".  Lily, abducted from Earth by alien slavers, is with Theusand--who seems to have rescued her from the slavers. His race can communicate mind to mind.  They have stopped on a world while en-route to his Dominion. They're visiting people he knows. She suspects he has some connection to them that he is keeping from her. They live in a cave system to escape detection of slavers. It's evening and their underground village has gathered for storytime. Narge, one of the villagers is telling the tale of the Bulragers invading their world to gather slaves. Last week ended with: Forcibly, the diaspora of our people had begun again.  Creative punctuation ahead--to comply with guidelines. :-)

“Children were dragged away from their mothers’ arms, and fathers were beaten and chained for trying to protect their families.

“Then the invaders scorched our land and destroyed our crops to force us into nonresistance. We prayed for the evil, the pain, the death... to stop.

“Instead, the Slatheks came, our worst nightmare, cruel beyond belief. They mined our beautiful world for every mineral they could haul. Sucking entire lakes dry, they annihilated the grasses and the flowers, the trees and the animals. 

"The Bulragers rented our people to them for labor.

“The worst, though, was that they were carnivores—of the basest kind. Many of our brothers and sisters, even babes still nursing at their mothers’ breasts, perished in their soup pots. Their bones were left scattered on the barren lands and the sun shining in the rainless sky bleached them ghostly white.

  Now you have it--what happened to their very own Shangrila...

That's it for this week.  All opinions greatly appreciated. :-) Thank you so much for visiting and for commenting!

Weekend Writing Warriors January 20, 2019

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors

   It's time for snips and bits of amazing tales by talented writers! Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM Sunday, EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
             Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE
            This week's snippet is from my WIP, "The Sands of Dhor".  Lily, abducted from Earth by alien slavers, is with Theusand--who seems to have rescued her from the slavers. His race can communicate mind to mind.  He is taking her to the "Dominion" he is from. Theusand has been eavesdropping on Lily's conversation with a woman named Leese, and just heard her say that there is no romance between her and him.  Leese speaks first. Creative punctuation ahead.  

 

Leese made a clucking noise. "I’m not one to see something that does not exist. Search your heart.”

Lily’s thoughts were silent; she was cold. His learning opportunity was being thwarted by her discomfort. 

Finally she started to mull over Leese’s words. He sensed her waver—which wasn't unexpected considering how prone she was to leaning toward perceived, shifting gravity. In a better moment, she may have professed undying affection for him, or at least close to it. Ah well… in time he was sure she would. He would make her his.

His "learning opportunity" is a creative way to look at eavesdropping, huh? That's it for this week.  All opinions greatly appreciated. :-) Thank you so much for visiting and for commenting!

Weekend Writing Warriors, August 5, 2018

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors!

It's time for snips and bits of amazing tales by talented writers! Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM Sunday, EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
             Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE
            This week's snippet is from "The Sands of Dhor".  Lily, abducted from Earth by alien slavers, is in a room on the ship with a portal she can see the outside through. She's recently learned that Earth was destroyed and her husband and children are dead.    

          This week's snippet begins a new chapter:
 

Like so many other days, Lily was in the star room trying to picture where home had been.  It wasn’t as if she’d actually know if her eyes did happen to rest the direction of Earth. But she couldn’t stop her thoughts from going there, or her eyes from searching for home.

 Was it all gone, she wondered—like they’d used some super-nuke on it and melted it into oblivion? Or was it still there, a sheet of glass, or a smoking hulk… a reminder of what had been? A charred warning for all to heed of  what waited out in the cold darkness of space?

She remembered an astronomy class she’d taken, and how many times the conversation had keeled off course. Young, idealistic students imagining what was out there in that vast vacuum, and she’d been one of them. “Extend the hand of friendship. Welcome alien visitors with open arms, if and when they arrive.”

  That's it for this week.  All opinions greatly appreciated. :-) Thank you so much for visiting and for commenting!