Welcome to my world and beyond...

A collection of snippets of the books I write and, occasionally, my life and the things that inspire my writing...

Saturday, May 9, 2020

WeWriWa: EU 27

    
    

              Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors. First thing: Happy Mother's Day whether you're in the USA or not. Doesn't matter if your babies have two legs or four. Bravo to you, mom. You got this.
      Now, the announcement. In short, the WeWriWa rules have been relaxed. The goal is to maintain ease of finding the weekly snippet, but allowing more promo for published books. You can check them out here: http://wewriwa.blogspot.com/p/the-rules-of-wewriwa.html
      We love our core group, the close-knit community that has evolved here at WeWriWa, the ease and joy of our weekly 'gathering,' but we also recognize that the time authors spend sharing and commenting has to make marketing sense, too. Time is precious. 
     I've taken advantage of the relaxed rules in today's snippet. I've seen other people do it, and it makes sense.  I completed my snippet within guidelines--and then marked it as such. Then to complete the thought, I added additional sentences. This is fine for every participant to do. Sometimes the excerpts just need to be longer.  And, it would also eliminate the need for the "wonky punctuation to stay within guidelines" disclaimer.
  


      If you'd like to participate or read tempting morsels from other authors, please sign up--or check the linky list at: http://wewriwa.blogspot.com/
     This snippet is from Emmily, Unbound, an SFR story.  To read a compilation of all snippets posted for this story, click Here: Emmily Unbound, Chapter 1  Emmily, the main character, has lost pretty much everything in the last twelve months: her marriage, her parents, her job, and her house. She and her dog, Murphy, are moving to the mountains of Pennsylvania, into an old, remote, hunting camp her parents willed to her. It's her first full day here, and she's in the tiny local town getting supplies. She's drawn the (unwanted) attention of a local, and he's trying to make conversation with her--about UFOs. This week opens with her thoughts. The last line last week, was:
I mean, it’s intriguing but there’s always a rational explanation for these things.

         We're in the scene that changes everything (It's getting close). And, F-Bomb alert. Here we go. ;-)  The snippet:

  
    
      Now, how do I get rid of this guy?
     Before I come up with a plan, a man in a way-too-big flannel shirt exits Chuck’s and looks our direction. He yells, “Hey, Linus!”

     The man before me, who I assume is Linus when he turns and looks at Mr. Flannel, mutters, “Fuck.” Then he adds, “Leave it to that dipshit. A'course he gotta break up my chat with the prettiest gal I seen in a while.”

     “Can I bum a ride home?” the guy shouts.

Linus rolls his eyes toward me then yells back at him,“Sure, hop in.”
      He hurries across the street, his gait slightly off-kilter. While he climbs into the truck, Linus gives me a sort of Elvis-half-sneer-half-grin.
     That's the snippet. If you want to read the offer that grin was leading up to, I'll finish it here: 
     Then he says, “If you’re gonna be around, maybe we can get together sometime. Shake a little leg over at Chuck's. Look me up. I’m there by four most afternoons.”
     “Thanks,” I tell him, “but I’m not much for dancing. Nice meeting you, Linus.”

      He pulls away, and he's not breaking any speed limits while he watches me in his side-view mirror.
      Well that's creepy. That's it for this week. Thanks for visiting! I am truly grateful for comments and suggestions, and for you taking the time to read it.

36 comments:

  1. It's probably a good thing they were interrupted. Great imagery. You put me right there in the scene.

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    1. Thanks, Karen! A couple more weeks and we'll get to the life-altering event. :-)

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  2. Great snippet, as always. You've got me wondering what role Linus will play in your story.

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    1. Oh, well, he's a local and he;s not going anywhere. lol. Neither is she--for now. He makes several appearances. I had not planned a second book when I wrote this one, so it can be stand-alone. I did end it with a hook for a second story, though. I have already sketched Linus into the second. :-)

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  3. Yes, my friend, I absolutle love this scene. She must watch that this guy doesn't go too far because she knows how to save herself. WOW!

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    1. She does. She's a survivor, and she's about to meet one heck of a challenge. :-)

      Thanks for visiting, my friend. Hugs...

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  4. Beautiful blog.
    Thank you for visiting my blog.
    Best regards Irma

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  5. I love the dialogue. It helps me to get an even clearer visual of this guy in my mind. Wonderful job, my friend!

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  6. Boy, did she dodge a bullet by the friend coming out. I can just see this guy talking her ear off for a very long and excruciating time otherwise. I too wonder if Linus will play a major role down the road Loved the snippet!

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    1. Thanks, Jenna. He is involved in some scenes down the road--a catalyst for several things. :-)

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  7. She did buy a baseball bat, right? Or a two-by-four? Linus strikes me as the kind of guy who's going to need more than a gentle turndown.

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    1. A two by four. She hasn't given up on the baseball bat, yet. :-) Thanks Alexis!

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  8. Linus is creepy all right! But I'm guessing whatever surprised you have coming for us will be worse even than he is...enjoyed the excerpt!

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    1. Way worse...and then, maybe way better. ;-) Thanks, Veronica!

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  9. Oh yeah, I'd be looking him up like . . . NEVER! Being on the look out for him is more like it. She's got good instincts!

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    1. She does, most of the time. lol Thanks, Nancy!

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  10. Definitely creepy! Thank goodness for that guy interrupting! But what will she do about the information he gave her in last weekend's snippet?

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    1. She's quite the pragmatist. Or maybe she's Thomas--full of doubt. ;-)

      Thanks, Jessica!

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  11. I don't think this will be the last time we see Linus. Either he will be the creepy stalker type, or she is going to need his help.

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    1. You are a perceptive one, Jeff. :-)

      Thanks for visiting!

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  12. Creepy is right. I like this new format. It will be fun to read more and not be constricted or use "wonky" punctuation.

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    1. I'm glad you like the new format. I was afraid our little core of wonderful regulars would rejecy it.

      Thanks for visiting, Diane!

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  13. Creepy is a good word for this guy. He gave me the creeps all right.

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    1. Haha. My work is done here. lol Thanks, Elaine!

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  14. Everyone else said what I wanted to say - creepy.
    Thank you for letting me know my link didn't work- absolutely no idea why. Fingers crossed for next week.
    And thank you for the info about the additional lines - so you noticed that slight - ahem - run on sentence.

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    1. Lol, oh my, no. No one in particular, Daryl. We all create some run on sentences. :-)

      Just trying to make it work for everyone--especially authors trying to move books. :-)

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  15. Def creepy, though his name probably had something to do with that feeling as well. Thanks for the update on the rules as well - what a great idea!

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    1. Cool! I'm glad you caught creepy vibes from his name. :-) Make everything work hard in our writing, right? :-)

      Thanks for visiting!

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  16. Linus really is creepy! I'd be leery enough about any stranger hitching a ride with me.

    The new format sounds great. Sometimes a few extra lines are necessary, so long as people don't take it to extremes and post super-long excerpts.

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    1. I'm glad he's coming across as creepy. That was the intent.

      Glad yu like the new format idea. Thanks for visiting. Have a wonderful week!

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  17. Loved the back and forth dialogue. Something tells me Linus won't stop at that...

    Keep smiling,
    Yawatta

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    1. Yeah...he's going to push things--and that might anger the wrong person. :-)

      Thanks for visiting!

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  18. Eek. That whole interaction with Linus just left a sour taste in my mouth. I hope he doesn't become a persistent jerk. Yay about the new rules! Thanks! <3

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    1. Yeah, he was a fun bad guy to write. lol

      I'm glad you like the new guidelines. :-)

      Thanks for visiting!

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