Welcome
to Weekend Writing Warriors, where we share snips and bits of amazing tales by talented authors and writers. Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished (we like it all) on their own blog to go live by 9:00 AM each Sunday. Then we visit each other and read and comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
Snippet Sunday group from facebook, not us, but many of our participants do both, is HERE
Snippet Sunday group from facebook, not us, but many of our participants do both, is HERE
This snippet if from Emmily, Unbound, a contemporary romance with scifi elements. It's in First-person.
There could be wonky punctuation to keep within the #wewriwa
guidelines.
Emmily, the main character has lost pretty much everything in the last twelve months. She and her dog, Murphy, are moving to an old hunting camp her dad and mom willed to her. She's listening to the
radio for
distraction, and the Deejays have just gone on and on about a possible
UFO
sighting. Jason is her ex-husband, and he didn't like the hunting cabin.
This is chapter one. Last week's snippet ended with this: To say that Jason never liked it is a big understatement...and it’s one
that leaves me bitter.
The snippet:
When
we reach our turn-off, rock escarpments perched high above both sides of the
road appear ready to tumble down onto us. Pennsylvania bluestone buttresses,
keepers of the gate to Wheeler Ridge.
I
do remember them; their tall, shadowy silhouettes scared me when I was a little
girl. My grownup writer’s mind can still make them into monsters.
I
need to stop this train of thought. It’s pretty lonely up here, so no monster
thoughts allowed.
Murphy
sits up, alerted by our slowdown.
We
turn left then drive along a rocky stream dotted with water spilling over
rock shelves. It’s kind of spooky in the shade of the mountain and the
darkening day. A shiny, black SUV barreling by the other direction crowds us,
but lane-hogging isn’t hard to do since the paved surface is only about one
and a half cars wide.
That's
it for this week. It might take me a few days to make my rounds. I'm having a gingerbread house decorating party today. It takes longer to recover from those things the older I get. :-) Thanks for visiting! I am truly grateful for comments, suggestions, and for you taking the time to read it.
I like how she can be creative as an adult using memories of what frightened her as a child --the silhouettes.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kate! It was fun--putting a writer into the MC position. There's a couple zingers in the story because of that. ;-)
DeleteI liked the "grownup writer’s mind" line. It serves to characterize both the scenery and her.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Ed! Wasn't sure if it was working. :-)
DeleteUh oh, the shiny SUV seems ominous somehow. I loved the description of the rocks and the whole thought line of how as an author she could stil lspin stories about them. Great snippet!
ReplyDeleteNeat! Thanks, Jean!! :-)
DeleteI liked how she's trying to bolster her courage, but she knows she's going to be alone in the middle of a whole lot of nowhere. Hope she keeps her guard up. I think the black SUV is suspicious too.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jenna! Yep, she does give herself pep-talks, sometimes in her head, and sometimes out loud. lol
DeleteIn the next couple of paras, the black SUV becomes more clear. :-)
Oh man, I wanna come to your gingerbread house decorating party! Wonderful snippet. Your writing flows so effortlessly, and the descriptions are so vivid!
ReplyDeleteI would LOVE to have you come to one of the parties. There were 37 people here. 15 houses decorated. I'll try to post some pics next week. These houses were mostly decorated by children. The next party is mostly adults.
DeleteThanks for the kind words about the writing flow. Squee! I have never been told that before. :-)
I love my wewriwa peeps. <3
I agree that the SUV seems ominous. I bet you have a wonderful time decorating the gingerbread houses.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Elaine. The black SUV is a clue--which she's great at ignoring. ;-)
DeleteOh my, the gingerbread party- so much work, but even so much more fun. Been doing it for years. This generation of kids is getting old enough that they're going to soon decide they're too old for things like this. Maybe in 10-15 years, their children will be ready to come and do it.
You created an ominous feeling with the shadows and her memories plus the SUV. Very nice.
ReplyDeleteLove the imagery. The SUV seems ominous.
ReplyDeleteYour gingerbread house decorating party sounds wonderful! (I'm late commenting most weeks, as Sundays are pretty full for me and I don't get on-line until late.) I'm worried about that SUV too - and the imagery of the rocky escarpments you paint is wonderful, very atmospheric! I'd love to be a beta reader for this if you're not in too much of a hurry!
ReplyDeleteI live down a road that's only "one and a half cars wide" for much of it. My itty-bitty car's always having the cringe near the edge of the road for SUVs. Although, none as nearly as ominous as this one. MIB?
ReplyDelete