Weekend Writing Warriors May 1, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)! :-) Happy May.

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live before 9:00 AM Sunday EST. (We check sign ups and remove links when we don't find a wewriwa post to save ouir participants from clicking on empty links--so please have it live by 9:00 Sunday morning--eastern USA) Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily, and her dog, Jobe, were captured.
      Lily is on the ground with her wrists and ankles secured. It is dawn, and the alien commander and Lily just locked eyes. Last week's snippet ended with Lily asking the alien why he'd spare her dog's life--or hers for that matter.
Creative punctuation alert. 

We continue from there:

His brows furrowed.

Lily spat the words at him, “You know, like you kill everyone else you get in your sights?”

His face relaxed. “Not everyone, but that is a reasonable question. We kill many, but when we can capture with low risk, when our targets bear no arms or we greatly outnumber them, we assess slave value.”

Bile rose in her throat. Slaves.   

“You are interesting, small but mighty, you have a fierce warrior inside. You  defied me, daring to spit in my face when your death was at hand.” He surveyed her body, then continued, “And  you will be good entertainment for me.”

  That's it. So if you wondered what the aliens' "business" is, galactic slavers they are.  And having entertainment value is worse than having no value... Yikes!

Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors April 24, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)! :-) 

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good.
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily, and her dog, Jobe, were captured.
      Lily is on the ground with her wrists and ankles secured. It is dawn, and the alien commander and Lily just locked eyes. She demanded to know why.Last week's snippet ended with this:

"One scaly eyebrow went up, and his smile faded. “Your kind does not take pleasure in business?”

We continue from there:

“I’m done talking to you.”

His deep sigh of impatience was so human-like it sent shudders through her. “Talk to me,” he demanded. 

She looked toward the sunrise and remained silent, feigning indifference.

“Talk to me. Beg me for your dog’s life.”

She spun around and leveled her eyes at him. Her anger, only just ignited, raged through her like an inferno. “Why would you spare my dog’s life? And while I’m at it, why would you spare mine?”

  That's it. I am so sorry I didn't get around to everyone who so kindly left comments on my post last week. Life became unexpectedly hectic. I will do better this week. :-)

Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors April 17, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)!. :-) 

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily fled on foot. Her and her dog, Jobe, were captured by the aliens.
I've skipped ahead a couple of paragraphs. Lily is on the ground with her wrists and ankles secured. It is dawn, and the alien commander and Lily just locked eyes. She demanded to know why.

His voice, as lifeless as his pale face, was devoid of emotion—at least any she could detect. “It is business.” He came closer, leaned over and ran his hand across the scab on her cheek.

She jerked her head away and fairly growled through gritted teeth, “Don’t touch me, you liar.”

A mocking grin appeared on his face. “Liar?”

“Liar. If it were business, you’d take no pleasure, but I see how much you enjoy it.”

One scaly eyebrow went up, and his smile faded. “Your kind does not take pleasure in business?”

 Thank you for reading it. I learn from your comments--and I'm so grateful for any insight you share. Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors April 10, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)!. :-)  We're getting a shot of winter tonight. <-- I wrote that last week, too. Two inches of snow on my tulips this morning, and 14 degrees F tonight should just about freeze any fruit buds and lilac buds. ~big sigh~

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily fled on foot. Her and her dog, Jobe, were just captured by the aliens.
I've skipped ahead a couple of paragraphs. Lily is on the ground with her wrists and ankles secured. The aliens are falling asleep, and she's having a moment of reflection of what brought her to this moment. Jobe is right next to her. Last week's snippet ended with this:
"How stupid they'd been, counting on the mountains and rough terrain between home and New York to slow down aliens who had traveled across a galaxy, maybe even across the universe."
We pick up from there:

~As it was, Pittsburgh had still been full of people who didn't get away, adding to the thousands and thousands trapped as the Bulragers raced west. 

She and Damien discussed it. Their best plan was to make a run for Ohio, and try to stay in front of the alien advance. They’d agreed that no matter what officials said, there was no way the government could guarantee that fleeing refugees wouldn’t starve. So while she threw survival essentials into backpacks, Damien headed out to load up on anything he could scrounge. He was on I-279, trying to get back home when he called. That was the last time she talked to him.

He was still alive; she knew it.   He’d been an Army Ranger, and it'd take more than an alien invasion to stop him.~

    

Thank you for reading it. I learn from your comments--and I'm so grateful for any insight you share. Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors April 3, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)!. :-) Happy  April!   We're getting a shot of winter tonight. ~sigh~ It will go soon enough.

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily fled on foot. Her and her dog were just captured by the aliens.
Tentatively, it was a chapter end. I've skipped ahead a couple of paragraphs. Lily is on the ground with her wrists and ankles secured. For the animal lovers--Jobe is right next to her:

~Looking up at the stars, her tears finally came. Tears for her children—she  prayed they were safe. The government bus she’d put them on nearly two weeks ago was headed to Alaska. The aliens had shown no interest in colder regions, so her little girls were in a  refugee camp far up north, along with her sister, her nephews, niece , and her brother in law.  She didn’t regret it though—staying behind to try to find Damien. He’d have done the same.

 News had come via the Emergency Broadcasting System that heavy Bulrager reinforcements arrived in New York City.  No one knew what to think--until the aliens started to move in mass numbers. Still, she and Damien never dreamed they'd have only two days to get out before the invaders reached Pittsburgh's suburbs.  How stupid they'd been, counting on the mountains and rough terrain between home and New York to slow down aliens who had traveled across a galaxy, maybe even across the universe.~

 That's it for this week. Thank you for reading it. I learn from your comments--and I'm so grateful for any insight you share. Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors March 27, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)!. :-)

 

Happy Easter --if you celebrate. And a belated Happy Purim--if you celebrate it. To all others, happy Sunday--it's  almost April!  :-)

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily fled on foot, pursued by aliens after lobbing a grenade at them --leading them away from a bunker where a dozen children and two old women are hiding. She's been joined by her dog, Jobe (nickname Jobo). After reaching what's left of her house and then hiding inside, they've been captured by the aliens. The alien commander has just informed her what her and Job's status is.
"He pointed at Jobe and said, “Food,” then he pointed at her and added, “Entertainment.” "
We pick up from there:

Screw that. With nothing to lose, she turned to run with Jobe, but a fist to her stomach knocked the wind out of her. On the ground, helpless, she watched one of the aliens grab Jobe and drag  him away. Her poor dog was no match for the creature's size and might, but that didn’t stop him from growling and snapping anyway.

It seemed an eternity before she sucked in air. She’d barely taken a full breath before another alien yanked  her to her feet. A shove to her back sent her stumbling after the rest. She didn’t know where they were taking her, but was sure that no matter where it was, in the end it would turn out to be hell.”

    

That's the end of chapter 1.

Thank you for reading it. I learn from your comments--and I'm so grateful for any insight you share. Have a great week!

Weekend Writing Warriors March 20, 2016

Hello all my fellow Warriors (and Snippeteers)!. :-)

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly bloghop.  Each week, participants sign up HERE at wewriwa.com, then post 8 to 10 sentences of their work, published or unpublished, on their own blog to go live between noon, Saturday, and 9:00 AM Sunday EST. Then we visit each other and read, comment, critique, encourage--all those things that do a solitary writer's heart good. 
              Snippet Sunday group from facebook--not us, but many of our participants do both, can be found HERE

Setup:  Earth has been invaded by aliens. Our MC, Lily fled on foot, pursued by aliens after lobbing a grenade at them --leading them away from a bunker where a dozen children and two old women are hiding. She's been joined by her dog, Jobe (nickname Jobo). After reaching what's left of her house and then hiding inside, they've been captured by the aliens. She just spit in the commanding alien's face. She managed to get Jobe freed--he was strangling, held by his throat. The aliens are not being gentle with her or her dog.
"She held his collar while she drooled bloody spit and tried to breath. "
We pick up from there:

The big, wasp-looking creature wiped his face. “I am Dev Areen," he said, no emotion apparent in his voice. "You will regret your disrespect for me.”   

He directed his gaze and his next words over her shoulder. “Bring them.” In spite of his even tone, a smile spread across his face, the kind of smile only a tormentor wears. He pointed at Jobe and said, “Food,” then he pointed at her and added, “Entertainment.”

    

Just when you think it can't get worse...

I did not attempt to use creative punctuation, though it may appear that way. I just spent an hour reading The Editor's Blog about punctuating dialogue.  :-) If anyone is so inclined, I'd be grateful for any feedback. :-).

Thank you for reading it. I learn from your comments--and I'm so grateful for any insight you share. Have a great week!